Jack & Jill Politics

Below is my actual back and forth with a kind of famous black “conservative.” Let’s call him Collab, my attempt at cute for Collaborator. That’s been abbreviated to TC in the text. I initiated the emails after hearing TC selling his little heart out on rightwing commentator Rusty Humphries’ radio show. Humphries calls on this Collab repeatedly to back something reactionary that Humphries has said. (If you ever heard the show, you’d know that, unlike some of his better known colleagues, who are at least skilled in disseminating their evil, Humphries just sits there and spouts racist and uneducated nonsense you’d hear in a dive with scruffy pool tables and that serves a whole lot of Pabst Blue Ribbon.) I’ve replaced the profanity—and there’s a bit, especially from him—with coinage that could pass the muster of a family oriented site. I’ve also deleted what I consider is now wordiness—mostly on my part, and I’ve also included—in parentheses—some comments.

Subject:
your tomming

Me: You’re getting the Tomming thing down wrong. I hear you every now and then on that Southern racist’s show–Rusty something, down in Atlanta. Anyway, you agree with everything he says. See, as I’ve noted, the guy’s a typical and limited Southern racist (much like Boortz); even black “conservatives” know that. One called after you appeared to say you were a “fool.” See, in order to gain a measure of credibility, you should say … when Rusty says something stupid about blacks–and that’s pretty much all the time… “I see what blacks are saying about that topic and to be honest, Massa (I mean, Rusty), they have a point, but I feel we made enough progress in Amerikkka (I mean, America) that we have moved beyond that point.” See? You can’t just jump in and say, “You’re right, Massa (uh, Mr. Rusty, uh, Rusty); I been preachin’ all along myself, suh, that no rightwing person since God Almighty done made us ever been racist; it’s dem dere peoples on da left.” I mean, you come off looking like a stooge. True, that is what you are but hide it better. I find myself embarrassed for you every time you open your mouth. C’mon, now, let me detest you for the Uncle Tom you are instead of mainly feeling sorry for you. Anyway, you take care, Remus ….and please note that I contact you in the spirit of constructive criticism.

TC (The Collab):
LOL. “I contact you in the spirit of constructive criticism.” You (f-ing) monkeys crack me up. What else do I have to agree with you on? Your love of fat ugly women? Do I have to love that fact that you like having sex with children?
I’d gladly give up supporting ignorant (posterior female dogs) like you for anybody of any color.
I respond to you in the spirit of KISS MY BLACK (POSTERIOR)! LOL

(“Monkeys”? Yeah, I’m being snarky, but Wow. Anyway, I’m gratified others have apparently broached this topic with the Collab; these folks are, as I pointed out in another blog, dangerous.)

Me: You’re a rather touchy Uncle, aren’t you? Oh, for the record, I’m a guy but it’s good to know your feelings about black women. My guess would be it was your mother. But trust me, all black women aren’t as disgusting as she apparently is. You’re Exhibit A, by the way, of my theory that you Uncles are merely self-loathers. Those people whose (posteriors) you rush to kiss played such a role in this pathology. Learn to at least like yourself. For starters, get away from the racists who detest you. You’re such a sad little man.

( I got thrown off with TC’s reference to the female dog, so I thought he thought I was female even though the beginning of his missive makes it clear he doesn’t. However, I don’t suspect I’m too far off base about his feelings for black women. Actually, I couldn’t care less who you marry, as long as it’s for love. I think it’s more than a coincidence that a lot of these Collabs marry, well, folks who don’t look like Mom.)

TC: LOL. You can’t make me touchy, PedOphilaji. For the record, you are a (f-ing) putz. The nerve of you trying to tell people how to BE. As if you have it all together. I bet your sorry (posterior) is a (f-ing) WRECK of a person. Can’t keep a woman (or man), children hate you, no friends, so you sit around calling black people who don’t have your GLORIOUSLY (f-ed) up life to be like you!
What is so dangerous about DIFFERING thought in the black community? What’s scares you imbeciles so much. Is it the fact that some blacks might listen and begin feeling like victors instead of victims?
Each year I save about 70+ black children from you (f-ing) losers, and they go on to live beautiful lives, thinking for themselves (off the plantation.) YOU should try it. As my grandmother would have said, “Don’t be ignorant your whole life.”
(Screw) you very much, “good guy.”
(I catch a plea in there and for a moment I feel sorry for him. But I get over that. Like I said, these folks are dangerous. And wait a minute. How did he know my kids hate me? Just joking. I think. But funny he should mention that. My daughter has said I hate everybody. Anyway, I’m noticing something now about the Collab. He has a pouty mouth. I figure it’s time to descend to his level.)

Me: You have a very nasty mouth, Uncle Tom. I wonder if your racist “supporters” know you’re so foul. You’re super-polite to them–yet another example as my Exhibit A for self-loathing. I know. I hit a nerve. Good. Examine your life. Find out why you hate your own people (you) so much. Again, I’d point to your mother, or maybe Pa. Apparently, they hate (or hated, if they’ve gone on to their deserved expirations) black people too and taught you. I’m sure your grandmother–as would anyone in her generation–finds you, as she well should, disgusting. (And what’s with the repeated references to pedophilia–projecting? I wouldn’t be surprised. That is the behavior of a self-loather.) Now, to get to your level. You are a piece of (feces), something to be flushed. Frankly, I don’t care if your sorry (posterior) comes around or not. If a Mack truck hits you tomorrow, I’d say that would be cause for celebration. I’m not trying to save you. I’m not that noble. I’m just calling out your tortured (soul) for the Collaborator you are. The good news is that I’m not alone.

TC: My mouth is cleaner than your mother’s crotch, (Female Dog)! LOL
(Deep, huh?)

ME: You’re gay, aren’t you? Not that, of course, there’s anything wrong with that, but the constant references of a (female dog) to another guy and it sort of fits my self-loathing meme for you—since society despises gays too.

TC: LOL. You wish I was gay. Typical LibTURD, homophobe, but Conservatives are intolerant. When you see your mom and dad together, do you see two women like everybody else? Oh that’s right…you don’t know your daddy! LOL
ME: Spoken like a classic Newt racist. Or I guess that’s part of your “differing opinion” — which is always in sync with what Rush or the Grand Dragon would say. Wow. We couldn’t make you up. By the way, you are the un-busiest Uncle I’ve run into. Doesn’t Rusty, or Rush, need his shoes shined or something? Don’t let me keep you. Frankly, I am busy. I’ve told you what you needed to be told. I told you I’m not alone. Actions will take care of this ultimately. I don’t see what else is there to say beyond letting you know what time, metaphorically, it is. So go away, Uncle Tom, go away.

TC: (That’s) the best you got, punk? LOL. Your mother has hairy balls!

I guess he told me. So that was it, my correspondence with a Collab. Oh, and this all will be decided by action ultimately. In the interim, we need to keep calling them out. But this differing opinion business. Isn’t it amazing how what they, uh, believe can also be found on a white supremacist blog? We’re lazy folks who like to make babies and go to jail and Lord knows why since as we all know blacks face no injustice in the American workplace or courts at all; heck, it’s the blacks who are the racists. And I suppose all this means that Benedict Arnold was not a traitor; he merely had a differing opinion.
And no, I didn’t enjoy the exchange as much as it may seem. I don’t really get off calling people Toms, or Collabs. I’m from the sixties. I’d seen a lot of blacker-than-thou then. I think that was why I never bought a dashiki. I’m also an artist. Which means I’m not naturally drawn to group-think. But the sheer audacity of this current crop of Collabs makes me feel I have no choice but to enter this fray. These are some dangerous folks. Last I checked, we’re trying to win something here. They stop progress. If you’re gonna win, whatever your movement, you need as many people as possible on the same page.