I had to almost insulate myself and create a separate value system and world than the one that was forced upon me.

We will have to ask one to be almost revolutionary in their thinking. To emancipate themselves and unfortunately, most people do not look to do that.

Every aspect of our society perpetuates certain ideologies and value systems. One would have to resist and counteract…most people are simply aiming to be validated…most are not this brave or out of the box. Therefore, they will settle for the same old beliefs, standards and ideologies. Its the unfortunate side of human nature and psychology.

“It doesn't take us parents off the hook in terms of making a point of exposing them to other cultures, but it really helps.”

There's a poem tiltled: Children Learn What They Live

Children Learn What They Live
by Dorothy Law Nolte

If a child lives with criticism. He learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility. He learns to fight.
If a child lives with ridicule. He learns to be shy.
If a child lives with shame. He learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives with tolerance. He learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement. He learns confidence.
If a child lives with praise. He learns to appreciate.
If a child lives with fairness. He learns justice.

If a child lives with security. He learns to have faith.
If a child lives with approval. He learns to like himself.
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship.
He learns to find love in the world.

chalk it up to the malia/sasha EFFECT!!!

you representin, FIRST Family

Values !!

now…it's a new bar and a new day.

But the key points of my statement:”Part of the issues is not having POSITIVE popular representation in the social consciousness for these categories.”

and this

“where are the popular representations of our values as black people? … Whatever the value- do we have a popular image for this value?
And we may have that picture for this symbol of our values but does anybody in the larger society see it?”

For me this points to the fact that there should be several levels of social consciousness:
1. Positive popular images of black people in the larger society
2. Positive popular images of black people in black society
3.Positive images of black people in a person's social sphere ( home, work, church, school)

I think that teacher, coaches and parents could come in at all 3 levels but obviously have their strongest effect at # 3. Jesse Jackson came in at # 1 and 2 and by definition if these are popular images they are going to change and should change with the times.

I think these symbols only become a detriment if we arent looking at all the symbols and how they interact. If you hold up # 1 symbols you miss the #3 symbols than you have lost the richness of all 3.

Also we need to understand that all these symbols are created and have their own narrative and ways in which we value some symbols and devalue others.

Who is a popular face upper class black people?
Who is a popular face of middle class black people?
Who is a popular face of a working class black folk?
Who is a popular face of poor black folk?

Example: Jessie Jackson Sr. when he realized Barack
was surpassng him. Jessie, at one time was admired as a role model for Blacks too.

It appeared Jessie wasn't even capable of accepting a new symbol- in Barack; he even stated he wanted to “cut Baracks nuts off.” He took us as far as he could.

Are we going to see our youth of today take these symbols of what Barack has done to transfom the symbol into something uniquely their own?

I agree big symbols are important as a shorthand for values and inspiration, but I believe that it starts with the high school coaches, teachers, parents, and even a fatherless household. Just look at where Barack landed without his father.

These are the folks that our youth have direct interactions with and who carry the most palpable influences.

I agree we need symbols, but they have their limitations and can become a detriment when we put all our eggs in one poverbial basket.

I was speaking about how I CHOSE NOT to react in a completely reactionary manner.

I have been in other forums that have frank and sometimes enlightened discussions. That doesnt mean people cant be inquisitive about publicly available information. It is indeed a pet peeve of mine when people ask or keep asking questions on boards that could have been answered by a little work ( googling).

This is a particularly sensitive issue because it represents a larger issue. Because I know about Asian hair, black hair, white hair and what people do to it. But people in the dominant groups rarely if ever have curiosity or interest about what happens to other groups of people– especially to those who often have an experience of being subordinate. A lot of the information is available with internet searching, books etc. But a lot of the reaction of persons from dominant groups is to ask the person from subordinate group “Teach me”.

The reaction when person from dominant group is questioned about this dynamic is to say “I didnt know. Why are you blaming me for something I didnt know? I am here trying to get more information and you are blaming me”.

I did not blame you for not knowing. I gave you the information you requested and suggested a book for you to read. And I also tried to give you some insight into how your question could be PERCEIVED.

If I wasnt in a teachable moment mode then I dont know what appropriate teachable moment mode is.

I would love to hear from someone light skinned with locs and their reception in DC and other places.