-er — NO! But, I lived through the 70's – funk, big “afro” & all! :>)

Heard It Through The Grapevine (Marvin Gaye)

**dancin'** :>) “Soul Train Style” :>) :>)

Cheaper To Keep Her' by MFSB

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMdbIRAoAm0

-er — NO! But, I lived through the 70's – funk, big “afro” & all! :>)

Heard It Through The Grapevine (Marvin Gaye)

**dancin'** :>) “Soul Train Style” :>) :>)

Cheaper To Keep Her' by MFSB

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMdbIRAoAm0

When I lived in the Bay Area, you couldn't rent a closet in San Francisco for less than $1500, and that was near The Point. Don't even mention Sunset or off Divisadero where the clubs are near that really trendy neighborhood, Something Heights.

I don't blame your friend for sticking it out and putting up with the lame ex-boyfriend. I would have done the same thing, especially paying $1100 a month and being closer to the job than having to commute on BART on a daily basis and hope there's not a malfunction on one of the lines during rush hour.

Remember that group, MFSB, back in the 70s? They did a great instrumental version of “Cheaper to Keep Her” and it was really fly.

Okay, I dated myself with these comments, but I really was a young'un who had to listen to what my older brothers listened on the radio, the stereo, or the 8-track player, or what my parents were playing on the stereo when they had people over to play tunk or bid whist. I grew up listening to R&B and jazz very early (try 7 years of age and knew all the words to “I Heard It Through the Grapevine.”

Cheaper To Keep Her

***shrug*** :>) :>)

One of the the most common ways to be impoverished is divorce. Many women who get divorced wind up in poverty it is one of the leading causes of poverty for single females with children. Sooo, Ms. Partridge is correct in the choices she has made.,

I do not even understand why she would listen to friends who obviously are clueless. Same for Mr. David her ex-spouse.

The only other arrangement I beleive they could have is to rent out the house to another couple and that would enable them to have separate living arrangements, until they could sell the property.

1. If I had friends like Nancy Partridge's, I would seriously need to reassess the people in my life. Homelessness is no joke. If one of my friends couldn't analyze the short and long term ramifications of the action s/he is recommending to me (e.g., letting a house go to foreclosure without having the resources to move to another dwelling), hopefully, I would still possess enough common sense to look at this person like they have three heads.

2. I'm going to take a guess that these folks aren't Black. Black folk are the masters of survival in this country. We do what we have to do until we can do better. This example would fall into this category.

If you won't turn into War of the Roses, then don't get hosed financially. better to have a place to live, than to do the pride thing and be homeless.

But no seriously, I can understand that life happens, and situations such as these occur. I also recognize that I am blessed, because I do have family members (and a best friend who is like my sister) that I could stay by if I needed to move out in a situation like this. So I can't judge someone for working with what they have.

However, I would not want to enter into a serious relationship with someone in this circumstance. It's not about the “living with your ex” that would stop me (although it would give me pause), it's the “not financially stable” part. Mind you, I'm not like one of those gold-diggers, or one of those stereotypes of Black women (where the man has to have all his stuff together to take care of me). I've been single for my entire 20s, and I've been paying my own bills just fine. It's just that I recognize that financial strife is one of the main reasons that people get divorced. If the man has a history of financial instability (which, if you're in a situation where you can't move out of the house, you may not be in dire straights, I mean, you have a house! But ya sure ain't stable!), that may not be something I need to bring in my financially stable life.

Not trying to offend anyone, I'm just gonna be real for a minute…